Potentiality . . . that is proper to the person is actualized most fully through love (the word “actualize” comes from the Latin actus: act, perfection). The person finds in love the greatest fullness of his being, of his objective existence. (L&R 2nd Edition, p 66)
In Love and Responsibility, Bishop Wojtyla analyzes love metaphysically to illumine the connection between love and being. This is part of his focus on man’s telos and his relationship to love. Of course, “love” has many meanings, which Wojtyla clarifies through his development of the concepts of “fondness”, “desire”, and “benevolence”. This development is in the elucidation of the good present in the other person: fondness due to the existence of good in the other person; desire for receiving the good in the other; and, benevolent actions that will the good for the other.
True love brings the loved one into a more mature, fuller life. But what does that look like? I think it means that one is able to fulfill more and more the two great commandments of love, as repeated by Jesus in the Gospels. If “action” follows from “being”, then maturation in love allows one to more freely will the true good of the other. In a sense this is reminiscent of meeting the needs as per Maslow—physical, emotional, and spiritual. It also means constant metanoite that allows me to relate to the other as a person, allowing me to recognize and will what is good.
And, also, to stay in relationship with the other, providing them with the means to give and receive love. While this might seem easy, the temptation to use the good of the other only as a means to an end then negates the personhood of the other, withdrawing from them (and myself!) the opportunity to love. In the end, we depend on relationship with other human persons for our existence, as shown in Genesis 2 when neither the presence of God or the animals was sufficient. It is not good for man to be alone, for he needs others to love.
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